The Metamorphosis of a Graduating SeniorPosted: April 3, 2013
eNotes’ editorial intern just graduated from university!
Wondering what it’s like to leave college and move on to the real world? Outlined here are the six phases of graduation… and yeah, they’re just a little scary. But don’t worry, you’ll get through it.
I just graduated a week ago. So naturally, I’ve been thinking a lot.
If I could paint you a picture of what my senior year looked like, I’d say it kind of resembled the Splash Mountain ride at Disneyland. I’ve summed it up with an acronym, “Yjecda,” which I’m pretty sure means “chaos” in Elvish, but don’t quote me on that.
Allow me to walk you through.
Stage 1: the YES phase
Man, you are so excited. You just caught sight of the ride. The line is long. It must be good. Everyone says it’s good. You are getting on that ride. Nothing can stop you. Except for maybe churros. There’s always time for churros.
Your face looks like this:
The start of senior year feels like uncontainable excitement. The thoughts bouncing through your head sound something like, “YES” and “THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST YEAR YET” and “YOLO” (for the bros).You’re amped. You know how everything works. You have your friends. You know the ins and outs and you’re just ready to make the most of them. The time is NOW. Like…right now.
Stage 2: the Just no phase
You get to the line, just as the time on that little board of dread changes to “70 minute wait,” and you hear the person in front of you yell something like, “I think the ride broke down.” SERIOUSLY. But you’ve already committed, so you just stand there sullenly, waiting.
You look like this:
Yeah, you’re over it. It’s probably winter quarter. You don’t want to take any more midterms or finals. You don’t want to go to class because it’s keeping you from doing the things you want to do (like sleeping). The library looks like a black hole. You’re antsy (in extreme cases, this might mean you’re in a rut. Eek…) You feel like it’ll never end and you’re not sure how you’ve spent so many hours and years studying and studying and studying. This is just not acceptable. You may acquire forehead wrinkle lines from excessive frowning during this stage.
Stage 3: the I’m Excited again phase
You may have waited an hour and a half, but you’re about to get on the ride. There’s only one little girl and her father left in front of you, and you’re prepared to take them down if you have to. You’re so close, you can smell the damp walls. Mmm,victory.
Your feel a little like this:
You’re so close to graduation you can taste it. This might be spring quarter, or really any time around a month or so before you graduate. You’re just so pumped about all the potential opportunities that await you. You feel free and boundless– like you can do anything you want. No more boundaries. You’re in charge of your life for the first time. AND YOU’RE REALLY EXCITED ABOUT IT.
Stage 4: Confusion
At this point, you’re on the ride. And it’s really dark. When you start moving, you realize you have no idea where you are or what you’re seeing. You’re sitting in a log and it’s not comfortable and you’re confused why they would design it that way. There’s noises. What are those noises? It sounds like water. Like a waterfall. “Oh my god am I going to die?” So many thoughts. You keep dropping every now and then when you least expect it and…what? Is that a rabbit? WHAT IS GOING ON?
You’re all like this:
This is usually how you feel about 2-5 weeks before graduating.
How did you get here? You feel like a child trapped in some body that’s been wrecked by four years of undergrad. Those memories. All those memories! You were just a freshman, don’t you remember? You’re thinking about when you got accepted, and when you decided to go here. You’re thinking about your first friends. You’re thinking about first everythings. My god, has it really been four years? You don’t understand anything anymore. Nothing makes sense. You think about how time flies and it makes you want to hug things. What’s happening?
Stage 5: Dread
“The drop. It’s coming. It’s coming. I can tell. IT’S COMING. Maybe if I close my eyes. Oh my god. OMG.”
Your face be like..
Well, you just finished your last college course. How’s that feel? Like crap. It feels like crap. What are you going to do? What’s your next step? Are you excited to move away from all of your friends? Are you stoked to have to assume real responsibility? Are you looking forward to leaving the university you’ve called your home for the past four years? Are you just going to love creating a whole, new life where everything’s different?
At this point, the answer to all these questions is a fat no. A big, fat no.
Stage 6: Acceptance
Well, it happened. There’s nothing you can do about it. You’re soaked in the kind of water you’re not supposed to jump into for fear of illness or disease. You smell like dirt. Water is seeping into your jeans. “Why did I wear jeans?” Mistakes, so many mistakes. But it happened. Time to go eat some pineapple frozen yogurt and get over it. You’re going to enjoy the rest of your day because you’re at the happiest place on earth. Just got to dry off a little first.
And you look like this
At this point you’ve accepted your fate. You’re done with college. But you know your life is going to lead you to lots of happy places. They’ll be different, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be bad. And you’re okay with it. You’re even a little bit eager to get started. It’s just going to take some adjusting, and you’re ready for that too.
You’re proud of yourself because you conquered college, and you conquered it with style.
So there you have it. The metamorphosis of a graduating senior.
Bring it on, world.